The Struggle With Infertility

As a Mom, I feel like I have been blessed so much by the family that my husband and I have been able to create. However, I would truly love to have another child. Yes, I’m 39. Yes, I have endometriosis. Yes, it took a lot of pain, medicine, shots and surgeries, to have our first son. I for one am sick and tired of being told what I can and can’t do because I’m 39. As women, people just assume that because of our age, that we all lose our fertility at the exact same time and year of age.

My struggles with infertility have led me in many different directions. I’ve had depression, felt failure and have been made to feel guilty by my own family to want something so crazy as to have a baby at 39. First rule of infertility, don’t tell someone with infertility that their journey is hopeless! As I mentioned before, I have endometriosis and a very severe case at that. Over the past 2 years, I’ve had 2 surgeries to remove polyps and cysts, and I’ve suffered through 4 miscarriages. This has been very crushing for myself, my husband and our son. Some people have said that we’ve tried and maybe it’s time to stop. Second rule of infertility, don’t tell someone when they should and shouldn’t continue! I was just at the doctor today for some testing and I’m awaiting the results next week. Our next move, if we can’t conceive on our own by the end of this year, will probably be the IVF route.

When we struggle with something that not everyone in our lives understands, it’s a huge comfort to speak to others who have those shared challenges. I decided a while ago to start an independent social media account that isn’t linked to anyone I know personally, but to other infertility warriors. These women have shown me so much love and support and have given me so many helpful resources. As many people know, infertility isn’t cheap. My main worry about being told that IVF is where I should go next, is the great personal and physical expense. For any of you out there who are dealing with the same issue, please look into CNY Fertility. I was referred to them by an online acquaintance and they do all of the infertility treatments that all other clinics do at a fraction of the cost. Their success rates also don’t diminish due to their prices. They have labs located all over the country, which makes it easier for people to travel for infertility treatment, which surprised me to be a very normal thing.

No matter what your infertility journey or struggle may look like, please know that you’re not alone. You just have to take it cycle by cycle, day by day. Reach out and find that support that you need and try not to let the negative people in your life deter you from your dreams. Only you and your partner know when it’s too much and you need to take a break or call an end to your fertility journey. But, no matter what you choose, you are never less because of those choices. You are more amazing than you will ever know just for going on the journey! With love and hope, Emily

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